We don't do what we do to inspire. We do what we do to survive and to thrive. Grief takes you on a journey. The journey is like a book with only the first chapter completed. Many people have a similar first chapter but everyone writes their own ending. Our book is not completed yet, only God knows the ending.
Two years on our journey now I am stronger than I have ever been before but in the next breath I am crumbling. My heart is overflowing with the love and joy for my husband, girls, family, and friends but in the next beat my heart is broken into tiny pieces.
You may not see it every day but many days I fight a battle. We fight a battle. The loss of a child is so deep...one day she was just taken from us. The depth of the pain a grieving parent feels is unexplainable and I hope you never have to experience it.
I don't share these emotions so you feel sorry for me. I share my journey because I know there are so many others on the same journey. When you have not lived the pain you cannot understand. Many days you feel crazy, you feel alone, and you are tired. Many days people with good intentions deepens these wounds by saying too much or not saying anything at all.
Grieving and helping someone who is grieving is just as personal as your thumbprint. Everyone is different and everyone needs something different.
Those of you going through this difficult time of year even though you feel alone you are not. So many people love and care for you, they just don’t know how to help, what to say, or what to do.
To those of you who don’t know what to say, what to do, or how to help start by saying that. Start by saying our angel’s sweet name and ask how you can help. You don’t have to have the perfect words, we don’t expect that. We don’t expect anything but we need to know you remember, you care, and you are there.
I never would have guessed this is the book I would be writing but I am. This is my life and my journey. I will be the author and together with God I will continue to write my story.
(Below is a great example of a way to help! Two years ago when we lost Adelyn my sister left these little notes around the house for me. These are two that I still carry in my wallet everyday!)